#26: Good Question!

Adding an extra dose of behavioral science to your week with our series In a Nutshell— a collection of behavioral science principles, explained in 150 words or less, written weekly by CUBIC director Allison Zelkowitz.

Have you ever read How to Win Friends and Influence People? According to this classic 1936 book by Dale Carnegie, five of the six ways to make people like you (see image below) involve focusing on them. 

Over 80 years later, Harvard researchers confirmed Carnegie’s advice. Across four studies, Dr. Karen Huang and collaborators determined that people who ask more questions, particularly follow-up questions, are better liked by their conversation partners. This is because they are perceived as more responsive, meaning they understand, validate and care about the person they’re speaking to.

 Huang’s research even demonstrated that, in speed-dating sessions, people who asked more follow-up questions secured more second dates.

Now here’s the kicker: despite the beneficial effects of asking questions, overall, most participants didn’t know that doing so would make people like them more.

At least, now, you know . . . and how do you feel about that?